Tuesday, 19th October 2021 — I have been mulling over whether men have any understanding of women and the feminine body. It appears whether we live in the Caribbean, or elsewhere, that there is a perceptible lack of reverence from the male population as regards females.
When will fellas learn that satisfying their needs is not what life is all about? As womenfolk, we’re dog-tired of being asked for sex, begged to give it up, or coerced into doing something which compromises who we are inwardly and spiritually.
We strive to explain to boyfriends, fiancés and husbands why we aren’t engaging in any intimate relations with them. Nothing we say sinks into their heads. No matter how many times we tell them “No!”, the gents persist in asking if they can do certain things to our bodies. I don’t need to be explicit for anyone to know what I’m referring to.
God made the sexes different. Each gender has her and his diverse attributes. We may have mostly the same corporeal parts. Nevertheless, there are certain functions of the female and male anatomy which are entirely unalike.
Men do not have menstrual cycles, bleeding blood from the vagina every month, nor can they become pregnant and give birth to a child. They also don’t go through menopause and have drastic changes in hormones or feelings related to intimacy. Neither do they understand how a woman’s desire for sexual activity fades with her ageing.
I have had men friends say to me, “If you don’t use it, you will lose it.” Most likely, it’s their way of trying to convince a woman that she ought to continue to have sex even if her emotions and chemistry aren’t functioning as they did before perimenopause.
It is absolutely senseless to believe this myth. Yet that is how some men think with their minds focussed on the “third limb”, as my aunt used to say. They always seem to be looking to satisfy themselves and don’t know how to relate to females’ conditions or centre attention on what women need.
Even when a woman explains to a man that she was sexually abused and has flashbacks to memories of the abuser, it still does not create empathetic sensitivity in him to cease asking her for sexual favours. Do menfolk not have any compassion for the traumas that ladies have experienced?
By Mother Nature’s design, mankind is built to be hunters and womanhood to be gatherers. Yet that does not entitle any male to pursue a female relentlessly with no mercy for how she is feeling towards him.
At this stage in life, we must focus on a higher connection with the Most-High Creator Supreme Being. Our souls need to take inward journeys for a deeper spiritual relationship with the Highest-Self. We must learn to honour, respect, and, in some sense, worship the temples of our bodies for they house our souls.
What we nourish the body with – in terms of nutrition, thoughts, spoken-words, emotions, caregiving – has a significant impact on us emotionally, mentally and physically. Ultimately, our overall wellbeing and health are affected. No one goes around neglecting the physical form for years – and does not bear the consequences of her or his mistreatment.
When we listen carefully to what our bodies are signalling to us, instead of going along with the influences of others, then we live healthier lives. Every person’s life is being transformed to a higher level of consciousness and light-heartedness.
Are we willing to pay attention, listen intuitively and work on self-healing to transmute old systems, habits and ways of doing things? Do we heed the Inner Spirit’s calling or cling to the past existing state of affairs that’s become outmoded?
With my endeavour to centre daily living on the self’s inner workings, it has initiated a true recognition of the meaning that the body is a sacred temple. The worldly things that caught my attention when I was younger are inconsequential now.
So, I am listening with my heart and soul to everything that my body is telling me. In essence, I’m hearing God’s calling to shift, as well as transform, how I sustain myself in this lifecycle. That’s exactly what the Divine Universe’s Great Chi is attempting to convey to all a’ we humans during this global pandemic.
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Kay M Ferguson is a contributing columnist who uses a nom de plume, The Empress Extraordinaire. Her words encourage us to explore who we are, evolve as human-beings and transform our world. Link with Kay at anguillawriter@gmail.com.
